A letter from the past…………………..
From an ignited fiery juicy Goddess!
This is a letter that I wrote many, many, many years ago that I want to share with you.
At that moment in time I felt my sensuality was buried deep down under layers of shame and fear.
After seeking help to dig up and explore my sensuality, I practiced the given assignment:
Here I am, standing in front of the mirror. Looking myself in the eyes very seriously: Yes I want to do this, I want to feel the woman I am inside.
So I kneel down in front of the mirror and start the sexy stretching exercises, moving, bending and curling all my feminine body parts. Watching closely every movement I make. Pushing my breasts forward, my hips to the side, swinging my hair up and down……………. And I feel sensual………. and I look Sexy!!
It feels wonderful and at the same time I feel so very sad. Knowing that for a long time I have been hiding all my sensuality from myself and from the rest of the world. Let’s not even talk about sexuality. I have beautiful and sexy lingerie and clothes hanging in the closet and that’s where it stays. I bought it because it seemed so nice and lovely to wear those beautiful things but in reality I’m too scared to show how sensual I am.
The thought that others see me as sexy and can be turned on by me, especially men I’m talking about now, but also women out casting me for me not behaving accordingly or turning their boyfriends on. I feel enormous resistance; I definitely don’t want that to happen. I feel afraid even for my own boyfriend, what will he think if I dress too sexy? That I’m a temptress, a slut? That I’m a bad person?!
And with that in mind, my sexy clothes remain in the closet.
Now, standing in front of the mirror looking at this beautiful sensual being, I feel I want to show the exercises to my boyfriend and I decide it is time to show some of my sexy side. Being sexy to my own boyfriend can never be a bad thing, right?
So I decide to make it something special. Some candles in the bedroom, some music, and….. sexy lingerie WITH stockings, yes all of it, hair loose. And a little twist, my boyfriend’s blouse on top.
I know he likes it when I wear his clothes, especially now that I have something exciting underneath. The edges of the stockings are just revealing themselves underneath the blouse so he can immediately see that there is something exciting happening there.
I call him to the bedroom and order him to lie down on the bed. While dancing I show my sensual stretching exercises, as I have practiced them and slowly unbutton the blouse button by button. I see that he feels a bit uncomfortable, he is of course not used to this from me.
l carry on bravely, I am doing this for him but especially for myself. I feel sensual and I am sexy and I want to feel good about it no matter what anyone else thinks! Especially myself! The important thing here, I realize, is that I really want to stop judging myself and look at myself with different eyes.
Ahhh, how nice, I did it and I loved it……and…..my boyfriend too!
I feel so relieved and happy and accepted.
The first step is taken, the first sexy set has come out of my closet, my feminine has come out from hiding for a long time.
There is so much more where this came from. My inner woman feels happy and ready for more.
It still touches me today, years later, reading this back. Of how much I was judging myself for my sexual feelings. And so happy for taking those first steps and making it all the way here. Here where I fully embrace and enjoy my sensual being, shining my sensuality into the world.
From sexual shame to sensual flame
Feeling free and happy
Are you looking for ways to shine your sensuality more?
I am here to support you if you feel the desire for your sensual being to come more alive and out into the world.
Feel free to contact me
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